When I was young, my mother had to scrimp and save to buy organic produce. I was poor, anemic and although I did not feel like I lacked in anything, apparently I did.
When my friends would come over my mother would warn me to hide the juice, not offer the snacks, and avoid giving anything away. We simply could not afford it she would say.
When I got older and met my dad he told me that the land I was born on was given to him and my mom at the behest of my grandparents, and that my aunts and uncles who I loved were not to inherit this piece of land.
As I grew older I continued to be secretive and selfish with this land with regards to my extended family who I love and care for, fighting my inclination to involve them and share their birthright with them, and trying to find ways to access it without sharing.
Now I am learning to heed the voice inside me that says “bring the nectarines to share at the party” and “organize some shares of the land for your cousins” and this has resulted in more party invites, and hopefully, support when it comes time to transform this land into a paradise on earth.
I am excited at the prospect of unlearning this behavior rooted in lack and isolation in favor of an approach that celebrates connection and abundance.