MKE Week 17hj – Disappointments Happen FOR Us.

Disappointments Happen FOR Us

Personal growth is hard to measure. Another aha moment today! I have many of them the further we go in this MKE Mastermind.

Yesterday, I had a “talk” with the couple that owns the water store I’m currently working out of one day a week on a Commission only basis. It’s about 30 minutes away from my house across the bridge in Washington. A year ago, I was excited to be there, to be a part of a team, (I am a blue), and to be mentored by Mikki. Jumping over, I excitedly introduced all the contacts I had accumulated over five years with my Vancouver BNI chapter and introduce them to the water store. Prior to that, I was an “orphaned” distributor. (At least that was the way I was introduced to the other distributors working out of the store).

Fast forward a year later, there have been some very unclear parameters around this so-called “adoption”. In my mind, “adoption” is permanent. In this situation, it is looking more and more like it’s conditional. To be clear, we never had a written contract or a clear understanding other than I was going to be working in the store one day a week and all sales through this store would go through the business and I’d make a percentage of each sale. Truth, I never thought to ask the question, “what happens when I am no longer working at the store one day a week?” I haven’t even bridged that question yet. (That will be chapter 2 of this story).

My point with regards to personal growth, became clear to me this morning after my sit. In the past, I would think about this situation, rehearsing dialogues in my mind, and thinking of scenarios that may or may not come to pass. I did think about it in my sit, however, it was NOT with a knot in my stomach. Even though I have thought about it since yesterday, (I would be lying if I said I didn’t), I found myself feeling amazingly calm. Also, I have been thinking of the worst possible scenario; handing over all the contacts I have worked so hard to create over the last 5 years and being OK with it.

The truth is, it does feel uncomfortable to me to not have a “group.” The difference I noticed in me today is that I found myself asking different questions. For instance, “is this really part of my Dharma?” “Why is it so important to me to so be a part of a “group?” Or “Have I been waiting for someone else to lead me when I should be taking the lead for myself?” That is like asking Jesus to save me over and over when in reality he did save me and it is up to me to have FAITH and live my truth! The most important question is, “Why is it that I feel the need to be supported?” “Is it possible to go out and create support for myself and maybe just maybe support for others?”

Since MKE and writing my DMP, I began asking real questions about what I needed to do in MY life to reach MY goals. The best part of this MKE is that I’m asking these questions!!! I can tell I’m at a crossroads. This negotiation is only just starting. No matter what happens, I am strong and will do what is right for me even if it means walking away and letting go of everything. I hope that that’s not the case, but regardless, I will do what I believe is RIGHT. Blessings come in many ways! Whatever happens now, I trust, will be a BIG blessing!